Imagine you climbed to the top of the corporate ladder. You became attached to the power, control, and money that comes with it. Then the company was bought out, and you lost your position. If you had become attached to the image of yourself as powerful, you might feel lost at sea without a job. But if you are able to do your job without attaching your identity to it, you will experience this change without anxiety or fear. You will be resilient throughout this change and you will be able to move forward. The key is detachment!
The secret of happiness lies in the mind’s release from worldly ties ~ The Buddha
When our attention is drawn outward, our heart-mind becomes entangled in the complex net of everyday activity. Attachments to things develop, until we are so involved with them that we lose perspective, identifying ourselves in terms of outer names and forms. As we slow down and turn inward, connecting with our inner light of awareness we naturally lose interest in external, transient objects. We realize that the ups and downs of life come and go, ever spinning around the motionless hub of our inner light.
In yoga, this is called Vairāgya. Vairāgya is a Sanskrit term meaning “detachment.” It is a state of being free of attachment to materialistic life. It can also be defined as the mental state of mind that lets go of all attachments that belong to the materialistic world.
When an object is perceived, it can produce an attraction, which can lead to an attachment. Over the time the attachment may grow into a craving, and not experiencing the object again will upset us. If we are unaffected by the presence or the absence of something then detachment is happening.
Actions repeated over and over create deep habitual patterns in our consciousness and usually influence future actions.
Detachment is to NOT allow our past action patterns, addictions, or strong desires to affect our focus. Diligent practice directed inward will, over time, cultivate detachment. For example, if you meditate regularly and reach the point of which you feel connected to that ever present divine light of awareness, you want to stay there as long as possible.When your attention returns to the outer world, things that you now know are temporary do not seem to matter much. Your priorities may shift. If you are approaching old age and have accumulated a lot of money, you may realized that you will be happier letting some of that go to those who really need it.
Wants are needs are part of living in a society. We cannot live without them. It is natural to desire and enjoy being around people you care about, to be attracted to beautiful things, or even to have fun with the latest electronic gadget. There is nothing inherently wrong with desiring something. Artificially withholding from ourselves goes agains our natural flow of life and is not detachment. But if we cannot fulfill our desires, if we cannot have what we want, do we become angry or frustrated? If so, then we are attached to those desires, and therefore, psychologically bound to them.
Detachment is in place when we are OK, whether or not our desires are satisfied. The inner contentment that grows from connecting to our inner light of awareness makes us not care as much about outer desires. When our primary desire is to experience the divinity within, then external objects lose their appeal.
The process of detachment goes as follows:
1- Identify an attachment by observing how we are when we do not get what we want. If we are throw off center, then attachment is there.
2- Next, we play with the attachment by occasionally not fulfilling the desire for it.
3- Overtime, we notice ourselves detached from the weaker attachments, but still connected to the strong ones. Eventually, even the strong attachments go away, and we lose our desire for them.
4-In the final stage, we tackle internal attachments, such as reputation, aversions, and habits.
The goal is to keep our heart-mind focused on the inner light of awareness that is inside of us and all other beings. The more attention is there, the happier we are. Letting go of outer attachments unloads a burden that is weighing us down and keeping us from experiencing freedom.
EXERCISES
Mantra : I will be deeply content when I do not depend on material things to make me happy.
Think of situations in which remaining indifferent is helpful to yourself and others. Are you able to be that way? Why or why not? Identify possible attachments associated with the situation. How can you detach from them?
As you establish a detachment practice, notice what attachments naturally fade. For example, when you being doing regular exercise to replace “lazy time”, you may notice yourself daydreaming less.
Sit quietly and meditate. Notice the path of your attention as it moves toward and away from the point of focus. Making a list of your to-dos beforehand may help reduce the amount of time your mind wanders.
See you on the next ride!
xoxo, Cristina
PS. Most of this writing comes from an incredible chapter from the book The Path of the Yoga Sutras by Nicolai Bachman: Vairāgya. Available in Amazon
